Lessons From a Kitchen

As I am transitioning in my life to probably a job outside of a restaurant I thought I would share some things that I have learned from working in a kitchen...

1. Hand + Melted Sugar = ouch + Bubbling hand

2. Kitchen Spanish and Spanish learned in a kitchen is not acceptable in most social situations.

3. As masculine as Mexican culture is... they play more grab ass than anyone I know.

4. To stop a 6ft, 250 lb Mexican from trying to kiss your bald head... Pull a knife on him.

5. Sharper Knives are what you want to cut yourself with... not dull or serrated. Deli Slicer is even better, I didn't feel a thing. (see photo)

6. When husking corn, one can find substitutes for a lack of hair. (see photo)

7. The door to the pizza oven is almost as hot as the inside of the oven, and does not agree with forearms. (photo again)

8. When using the bathroom at George and Walts... Don't touch anything... just trust me on this.

9. If you are ever a guest of the state at Santa Rita... they have good bologna sandwiches, but don't drink the milk.

10. eating 20 Thai chilies in 2 min, may seem like a good idea at the time. but they are just as spicy leaving the body as entering.

11. One can make people think you are crazy by talking to yourself and having conversations with random kitchen tools.. i.e. arguing with 2 pairs of tongs...
12. Just about everything is better deep fried.. but dipping the tip of your fingers in hurts.
13. "So mos Pocos perro Locos" We are few, but we are CRAZY!
14. If three asians have a threesome.. I'd call it a "threewaysian."
15. There are only maybe 15 different songs on Spanish radio... and they play them over and over and over, and they all sound the same.
16. When people order meat well done, It makes me want to hurt them..
17. It costs about $2000 dollars to have someone help you over the border..