Monday, March 17, 2008

5 years


I was thinking the other day about some stuff and wanted to know how many people can tell you exactly where they were and what they were doing 5 years ago? I can... I was in Bumfu#K nowhere kuait. To an infantry marine it was kinda like Christmas. 1400 rounds of linked 5.56 ammo for my light machine gun, 2 fragmentation grenades, and 1 AT4 anti tank rocket. What more could you ask from Uncle Samta Clause. It had been 2 weeks since I had last showered and would be another 2 months till I did again. After that the days would blend together, from desert, to village to city, they all look about the same. When people find out I was in iraq most ask "How Was it?" Some are sincere in there quiz, but most are not.. but to those who are not my friends or family, I say, How the Fu*k Do You Think It was. I could describe every single day but you still wouldn't get it. I can't describe what its like to smell rotting dead flesh, diesel fuel burning shit. how much sand I've actually eaten. How your body feels after going for weeks on little or no sleep, not much to eat and sometimes nothing to eat. So here I am five years later.. and what do we have to show for it... nothing, our country is in debt up to our ears, the economy sucks, and oil prices are still going up. Ive been dealing with depression for 4 years, taking anti-depressants for 3 years, Ive had ups and downs, dealt with a drug problem that i used to self medicate, I've had times where I could hardly function and found myself either working like a zombie, sleeping, not eating and crying or sobbing without being able to know why.
Life is much better now, and i enjoy things much like i used to.
There are things out there that someone 21 years old should not have to deal with, loss, death, fear of death, and to the point of coming to terms with your own possible death.. It changes you forever. Some might call it a loss of innocence. It sucks. But in the end we do it for a reason... we do it so that over 99% of the citizens and population wont have to. Im sorry that Code Pink in Berkeley cannot realize this and that their fight is at a much higher paygrade than to where they are taking it. They may say that they support our troops, but that is not possible when they tell you that deciding to join is wrong. Service to the country is no good for Berkeley, just the rest of the country I guess. I just hope they treat veterans such as myself and others better then they treated our vietnam vets, or in 10-15 years i fear we will see many homeless vets as we do today, suffering from drug and alcohol problems etc.
So Today, if you cant remember where you were 5 years ago, then find a veteran to thank.
Fu*k Off Code Pink.
Semper Fi.

sincerely,
An Angry Veteran.
out.

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